Stalemate?

Sometimes no news is not necessarily good news.  While Graham is not moving any steps backwards, it seems he is no longer moving forward to better health - stalemate.  He had 2 great breathing days last week; things actually started looking up.  On Thursday, he was moving around, out of the bedroom, and overall in a great mood!  He might have overworked himself because Friday, he was EXHAUSTED, but his breathing was still great.  Everything went back to "normal" on Saturday.  Horrible headaches, hard to move without being breathless, tired and no appetite.  We have never heard of the side effects of Photopheresis, maybe this (along with antibiotics) is what they are?

If this is our "new normal," great - I'll take this over dead ANYDAY!  And I won't complain (Graham might though).  However, there are all these great statistics for Photopheresis, why can't they happen for Graham?  He has completed 6 treatments in 2 weeks, we were hoping he would start to feel better.  He is done with his IV antibiotics on October 1st, fingers crossed he'll feel better soon after.

I went to my doctor today and as I was telling her about our past 2 months she made a comment that I have never heard before, "For every day you are down, it takes 2-3 days to recover."  Well, if he is "recovering" from the 16 days of hell he went through, then maybe this is normal for now, and things will finally start moving forward soon.  Well, if you do the math, 32-48 days from now.  But I'll still take it!

I go back to work tomorrow.  I have so many emotions running through me.  I am leaving Graham for the 1st day in 3 weeks.  I fully believe he is at a point that he'll be fine.  He knows he'll be fine, but I'm still nervous.  And on the other side...I am lucky enough to LOVE my job.  I miss all my friends at work and I MISS my students; I'm very excited to see them tomorrow.  It's as if it is my first day of school and all the back to school jitters are alive and well within me.  I'm sure I will supply many people of some unplanned comic relief tomorrow. Ugh.